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What does Heather McDonnell-Alford mean by "share the scar, not the wound" when posting personal content online?
McDonnell-Alford's principle is straightforward: only share a personal or difficult experience publicly once you have fully processed it and reached the other side — the scar stage — not while the pain is still raw and unresolved. Sharing from a place of open wounds serves you; sharing from a scar serves your audience.
Divorce, therapy, and the decision to wait before going public
McDonnell-Alford uses her own divorce as the clearest illustration of this principle. She did not post about it while she was living through it. She waited until she had completed significant therapy and had genuinely settled — emotionally — with the experience.
Only then did she speak about it publicly. By that point, the content was no longer about her processing pain. It was about offering something useful to people who might be going through something similar. The distinction matters: one is self-expression, the other is service.
This approach is especially relevant for professionals building a personal brand on LinkedIn — a platform where McDonnell-Alford spent approximately 15 hours per week in the early stages of growing her visibility. As she discusses in The Athena Rebels Podcast, authenticity on that platform is everything — but authenticity is not the same as oversharing.
Why timing changes everything: the difference between a wound and a scar
A wound is open. It is still changing, still reactive, still capable of infection. A scar is closed. It is evidence of something survived, not something still happening.
When you post from the wound stage, the content tends to reflect your current emotional state rather than any considered insight. The risk is that it pulls readers into your unresolved experience rather than illuminating something for them. McDonnell-Alford's point — explored in depth during this episode of the Athena Rebels Podcast — is that personal content has to clear a threshold of usefulness before it belongs in a public professional space.
That threshold is emotional resolution. Once you can talk about something with steadiness, with perspective, with something to offer — that is when it becomes content worth sharing. Until then, McDonnell-Alford's advice is to keep it private.
This principle pairs directly with her broader stance on personal branding: your LinkedIn presence is a reflection of who you are, and it needs to be intentional at every level. It is a point she develops further across the full Athena Rebels Podcast episode alongside her reflections on building Counting Creators' profile in the MSP community.
"When you speak about something personally online, share the scar, not the wound. If you're still in the trauma, it's the other side."
Heather McDonnell-Alford — Owner, Counting Creators.
McDonnell-Alford founded Counting Creators, an MSP finance company handling the full range of outsourced finance functions — from mailbox management through to compliance work. She niched into the MSP space within five months of launching the business, having originally planned to serve a different market entirely. Her professional brand, built almost entirely on LinkedIn, has since opened doors to a speaking career that includes the MSP Show 2025, two stages at Pax8 Amsterdam, and IT Nation London — described in the episode as the biggest UK conference in the MSP and IT industry. McDonnell-Alford is a guest on The Athena Rebels Podcast, hosted by Sophie Dowsett-Smith at Pax8.
See also
What is Heather McDonnell-Alford's advice for MSPs or professionals who want to start building a presence on LinkedIn?
Heather advises that you should never outsource your personal LinkedIn content because your brand is fundamentally you, and generic or AI-looking posts will undermine the authenticity that makes personal branding effective on the platform.
How did Heather McDonnell-Alford build her professional brand and speaking career in the MSP industry?
Heather attributes all of her speaking opportunities directly to her LinkedIn presence, stating that without it no one would know who she is. She spent approximately 15 hours per week on LinkedIn in the early stages, which led to engagements at the MSP Show 2025, Pax8 Amsterdam, and IT Nation London.
Why is industry-specific financial knowledge so important when accounting for MSPs?
Heather explains that knowing the MSP model means you know exactly what to look for in the accounts, such as how a Pax8 invoice should be coded across the correct cost categories — knowledge a generalist accountant simply would not have.
Key takeaways
- Only share personal or difficult experiences publicly once you have fully processed them — the scar stage, not the wound stage.
- Emotional resolution is the threshold: content posted from a place of settled perspective serves others; content posted in the middle of unresolved pain tends to serve only yourself.
- McDonnell-Alford applied this to her own divorce — speaking about it only after significant therapy and genuine emotional closure.
- This principle sits at the heart of intentional personal branding: authenticity on LinkedIn does not mean sharing everything in real time.